Upon Having It All

"You don't have to have it all together," said Sarah at Conversation Group. "You know that, right?"

No, I do not. I do have to have it all together. I've been learning that I have to have myself together, I have to be taking care of myself in order to be able to give to others, especially to give and continue giving. I have to give to others in order to love others. I have to love others in order to obey Christ. So yes, I do have to have it all together. I have to have the important things like sleep and meals and bills and exercise and quiet time and inner turmoil under control. I have to be on top of things like returning phone calls and making lunch dates and showing up on time to work so I can donate and tithe and spare meals. I need to have a short leash on my organizer so when I make promises to help with moving and creating and decorating and cooking I can keep them without compromising my promises for visits and emails and phone calls and playdates. I have to be on top of my cell phone plan so that when I say "call me anytime" you can. I have to make all these promises and keep all these promises so that I can be trustworthy, honorable, caring, and a part of real community. Jesus-like community that's up in your face, up in your refrigerator, up in your messy life with a hug and a hand and a tissue and a truth. I have to have it all together so that I can be Jesus to you, because Jesus was perfect; He had it all together. And you would have been glad to have Jesus around, so I have to make you glad that I'm around. I have to have it all together, because otherwise, you would have to be Jesus to me. All the time. Everywhere that you are up in my messy life. And I can't have that- I'm supposed to be Jesus, not need Jesus.
...Oder?